Bugs, Beasts, Balloons...Oh MY!

What the Thailand.

Its no India, but its certainly a wild oasis in its own right.





First Stop: Phuket.  (pronounced: foo-ket)

Adventure 1: Sooo...I did attempt to dorm in a hostel in Phuket Town, but how quickly I arose and leaped on out.  Attempting to rough it and maintain backpacker credo, I booked 5 nights at the Phuket Backpacker in downtown Phuket.   However, arriving post 10 pm after a delayed 7 hour flight from Sydney, I was in no mood for uninvited guests to share my bed with.  This short story remains G-Rated, given that my would-be suitors revealed themselves as spider #1, spider #2, moths 3, 4 and 5, and the big daddy Mr. Earthworm who slithered out of the drain every time I turned the sink water on.  Bllleeeaaa-YUUUUCCCK.

That fitful night, I slept without circulating air due to windows closed, engulfed in post-mortem insecticide, thereby high and poisoned and finally tucked like a mummy under the bed covers.

The next day + 4 nights, I indulged myself at the Baumanburi Resort.

Lesson learned: I personally am simply too divalicious for hostels in tropical Asia.

Adventure 2:  One of the biggest attractions remains to visit and snorkel off of gorgeous Phi Phi Island (pronounced: pee pee).  Most famous as the location where hunky Leo DiCaprio filmed the movie, The Beach, Phi Phi Island was later very hard hit by the 2004 Tsunami. Tourism dollars seemingly went and continue to go a long way to help rebuild and sustain this extremely friendly and beautiful environment.  

I figured I too would add my little cash flow to the speed boat tours that would guide me to snorkeling oasis.  I was not disappointed. Abundant fish of all sizes and colors, deep deep water, crystal clear underwater views except for the occasional flipper in your face, and waterbed like waves that allowed me to pseudo nap in the sun.  Excellent.

Of course, this wondrous day trip started with the delicate exchange at the sidewalk purchase booths where the very nice sales gals accosted me with, "Just one? Just one?...But, why just ONE?"

Lesson learned:  One can find Indian aunties all over the world.

Adventure 3:  What in the world?!  Boat speeds off.  Man Runs.  Man grabs on to extremely thin ropes. Man uses biceps, triceps to pull himself up onto ropes which are fast gliding high up into the air.  Man has nothing on but his shorts and T-shirt.  Man then hoists himself onto moving ropes so that he is now "sitting" on one or two alternate flimsy ropes.  Man then guides ropes, himself and another person through increasing height, shifting winds and circular motion around Patang Bay all without a harness, net or even sticky glue.  This, my friends, is the Thai version of Parasailing.

This simply has to be seen to be understood.

Lesson learned:  Awe (or the word "huh") has many different visual expressions in reality.

Adventure 4: 10 a.m., stranger picks me, and only me, up in an underdeveloped vehicle, drives me out of Patang Beach into the unknown hills and finally down a dirt road strewn with random shacks, buildings and more strangers.  Honestly, I thought I was going to die.  (American media does that to you: anything and everything peaceful can sadly seem like a potential horror movie).  Alas, my fears and paranoia proved insane to say the least and my elephant ride turned out to be one of the most exhilarating adventures of my young life.  Who knew you could get high without a smoke or lick of alchi.  At one point, my guide allowed me to sit on the neck of the gorgeous beast while he jumped off and commanded our beauty down the narrow, rocky paths of the mountain/hill.  Awesome.  And ain't no thang stepping out of the jungle onto a main highway where aaallll the roadsters stop and stare at the little girl, the Mahout, and the giga-normous elephant simply strolling along...So in princess style I smiled and waved.  Who knows, I may never get another moment of fame again. 

Lesson learned: Elephants are awesome.